5.5.5 Coaching Skills Training Program™ LEARNER’S GUIDE
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YOU ARE ABOUT TO EMBARK ON A LEARNING JOURNEY THAT WILL GREATLY IMPROVE YOUR EFFECTIVENESS AT WORK, YOUR INTERACTIONS WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY AND IN FACT YOUR LIFE! Allow me to briefly share. It was 1996, when I found my calling, my passion, my life’s work, something that I knew was truly needed in this constantly changing world - Coaching! As I began to learn how to coach and experience being coached I was profoundly amazed at the “magic” of it. I became more energized and broke through barriers in my own leadership and life and people I worked with did the same. They actually moved farther, faster, easier, quicker and smarter than they would have if they had not been coached. My passion for coaching has been relentless: I have coached executives since 1996 and at the same time became a coaching educator as lead faculty at Royal Roads University in Canada and Charter Faculty at the University of Texas. I supported the development of the growing field of coaching, produced a documentary on coaching AND founded Coaching Out of the Box® to support wide scale coaching skill development. To date over 33,000 people have benefited from our coaching programs and products. This learner’s guide is the result of all of the above PLUS the key dedication and coaching brilliance of another pioneer in coaching, Amy Ruppert, MCC. Amy has fine-tuned and dramatically enhanced the content . You are the beneficiaries of her almost 20 years of experience as an executive coach and coaching educator to thousands of budding coaches worldwide. Thank you Amy! My request as you embark on this program is to bring a willingness to experiment, a sense of curiosity and a commitment to support your fellow learners. Warmest wishes, Alison Hendren, MCC Founder Coaching Out of the Box®
Part 1: Introduction................................................ 3 What Is Coaching Really?.....................................................4 What Makes Coaching a Powerful Tool?..................... 7 Part 2: The Case for Coaching........................ 11 Coaching Works....................................................................... 12 Your Case for Coaching....................................................... 13 Part 3: The 5 Step Coaching Exchange......17 Identify.......................................................................................... 19 Discover........................................................................................ 22 Strategize..................................................................................... 26 Clear the Way........................................................................... 30 Recap............................................................................................. 34 Part 4: The 5 Core Coaching Skills..............39 Listening....................................................................................... 41 Questioning............................................................................... 45 Encouraging...............................................................................50 Requesting................................................................................. 54 Action Planning....................................................................... 59 Part 5: The 5 Guiding Principles.................. 65 Be Curious..................................................................................68 Be Accepting..............................................................................72 Be Supportive............................................................................76 Be Focused.................................................................................80 Be Committed.......................................................................... 84 Part 6: Putting It All Together....................... 89 Putting It All Together: Diagram 1.................................90 Putting It All Together: Diagram 2................................. 91 Part 7: Your Action Plan....................................93 TABLE OF CONTENTS
1 PART ONE INTRODUCTION
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3 PART ONE INTRODUCTION The International Coaching Federation (ICF), the leading global coaching organization, which sets coaching industry standards and provides examination and professional certification to coaches throughout the world, defines coaching as: “Partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.” This definition is upheld by Core Competencies, which were developed to support a greater understanding of the skills and approaches used within coaching. These Core Competencies have become the underpinnings for just about all coach training whether it is for business, executive, leadership, life or any other type of coaching. They also constitute the foundational learning that must be demonstrated in the examination process for various levels of professional coach accreditation through the ICF. Over 40,000 professional coaches have been trained, tested and certified with this common understanding of coaching proficiency in over 130 countries. These competencies have been tried and tested for over a decade proving they cross cultural, gender and age differences with ease. Coaching has grown at a tremendous rate since the early 1990’s when the first coach training programs were introduced. It has evolved, not only as a stand-alone profession for private practitioners, but also as a leadership competency with the demand rising in that sector. This program, and others at Coaching Out of the Box®, were developed by a group of early pioneers in the coaching profession. Some played a key role in the development of the Core Competencies for the ICF. This program has taken the complexities of those Core Competencies and put them in an easy to understand and quickly transferable model. It has been designed specifically for busy leaders to apply to everyday leadership opportunities and challenges instantly. As you enter into this program and acquire these new coaching skills, it is important to keep in mind that coaching is both an art and a science. While you will have concrete skills and concepts to work from, each individual you engage with in a coaching exchange is unique and will respond to coaching in a different way. They and their situations are fluid and ever changing so your coaching will need to adjust and flex to meet each individual, where they are, in that moment of time. This is indeed an art, refined over time with plenty of practice. We encourage you to be patient and observant as you cultivate your learning. Like an artist, you will begin to see the nuances and subtleties that result in profound VIEW https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=0D1m8vSfpAk expression of the art.
4 PART ONE - INTRODUCTION The best way to understand coaching is to look at what it is not, as well as the distinctions between several areas that may commonly be seen to overlap with coaching. Teaching or Training Teaching and training are based on imparting specific learning objectives that the teacher or trainer sets forth. It most often has a linear learning path and a set curriculum. In coaching, objectives are clarified in the process and are established by the individual or team being coached. The learning that occurs in coaching is discovery based, not linear and without a set learning plan or curriculum. Therapy Therapy deals with healing pain, dysfunction and conflict associated with self or with relationship to others. The focus is around resolving difficulties from the past which affect the individual’s emotional functioning in the present. The goal in therapy is to improve overall psychological functioning and ability to function in present life and work situations in an emotionally healthy way. Therapy outcomes strive for improved emotional/feeling states. coaching really? What is
5 PART ONE - INTRODUCTION Coaching, on the other hand, supports the personal and professional growth and development based on self-initiated change relevant to specific action oriented outcomes. These outcomes are linked to personal and professional success. Coaching focuses on the present and future and is forward moving at all times. Consulting Consultants are used to access a specialized expertise. Consultants use a variety of approaches however it is assumed that the consultant will investigate, assess and diagnose problems and prescribe or even implement solutions to those problems. The consultant is the expert. In coaching, the coachee is held as the expert and capable of discovering and generating their own solutions. The coach supplies support, creating a discovery-based environment and framework for the coachee to recognize their own resourcefulness and achieve their goals. Mentoring A mentor guides from their personal experience and shares their own experience(s) and knowledge as a template for best practices and best actions to meet outcomes and goals. A coach encourages the coachee to learn and guide themselves based on their own experience and knowledge and will support the coachee in designing an optimal framework for taking action and meeting goals. Performance Management Performance management is most often a structured process for individuals and teams to attain goals that are in alignment with departmental or organizational strategic objectives and priorities in the most efficient and effective manner. While leaders can take a ‘coach approach’ to performance management by using certain coaching skills as part of the process, the coachee in a traditional coaching relationship would initiate the strategic objectives and priorities. Emergency Treatment / Employee Assistance Program (EAP) Emergency treatment and EAP’s help individuals manage personal issues around things like substance abuse, emotional distress, major life events/crisis, healthcare concerns, financial and non-work related legal concerns, family/personal relationship issues/abuse, etc. Professionals in these areas provide assessment, counsel and refer to additional resources. While many of these types of things may come up in the coaching exchange or be mentioned as an obstacle or block impeding forward movement by the coachee, the coach does not shift into counseling or resource referring in these areas. Coaching is not appropriate for or designed to help coachees navigate crisis/emergency areas and should be referred to professionals that specialize in these areas. MENTORING COACHING TELLING Telling What To Do Solving Someone’s Problem Giving Advice Offering Guidance Asking Questions Helping Another Solve Own Problems ASKING TRAINING MANAGING CONSULTING EAP/THERAPY
6 Coaching Coaches focus on goal setting, outcome creation and personal change management with individuals and teams. Coaching most often takes place when: There is a desire to accelerate results There is something at stake (a challenge, stretch goal or opportunity) There is a high degree of change requiring rapid adjustments and additional resources or skills There is a gap - in knowledge, skills, confidence, resources There is a lack of clarity and complex choices need to be made There is a need to identify core strengths and strategies to leverage them Coaches are trained to listen, to observe and to customize their approach to individual needs. They seek to elicit solutions and strategies from the coachee. They operate from the premise that the coachee is naturally creative and resourceful and support the coachee to enhance the skills, resources, and creativity that the coachee already has. Coaches provide objective feedback that is direct, yet supportive and keeps the coachee moving forward. Coaches partner BESIDE the individual as they create meaningful goals and create actions to achieve those goals. The coach encourages and supports the coachee in their process of achieving those goals. And finally, a coach will almost always ask more of the coachee than the coachee would ask of themselves and stretches the coachee out of their comfort zone and into their fullest potential. COACHING DEMONSTRATION Given the description to the right, what did you notice in the coaching demonstration? PART ONE - INTRODUCTION GOALS opportunity accelerate results resources strengths VIEW: https://vimeo.com/manage/ videos/525057982/bbb2a13f42
7 Most often leaders are given tools that apply to behaviour and results, which can be observed and measured and lie above the surface for everyone to see. But what influences those behaviours and results is often left unaddressed and allowed to lie below the surface of what can be observed and evaluated. Coaching not only addresses what is observable, but also what is invisible and lies below and directly impacts performance. For example, the process of coaching often unearths emotions that greatly influence an individual’s performance such as fear, discouragement or doubt. With teams it can uncover hidden judgments, mistrust and misgivings about others. Coaching also uncovers an individual’s thinking that may not be informed by facts or even reality. In coaching there is opportunity to test a person’s thinking or group thinking with teams (without leading them into the coach’s thinking) to help them clarify and align with facts, reality and each other. An individual’s and group’s beliefs can be explored with curiosity and openness from the coach allowing a fertile ground for new ideas and perspectives to grow. Coaching is self-directed growth. Allowing an individual or team the freedom and choice to map out their own growth and development trajectory through challenges and obstacles and into what can be and is possible, empowers them with the recognition that they are creative and resourceful versus being dependent on leadership for the map. It is how leaders develop other leaders around them. PART ONE - INTRODUCTION What makes coaching a powerful tool? Observable • Emotions • Thinking • Results • Behaviours Invisible • Beliefs • Perspectives COACHING BRINGS AWARENESS TO THE HIDDEN INFLUENCER'S OF BEHAVIOUR.
8 PART ONE - INTRODUCTION
9 PART ONE - INTRODUCTION Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more?
10 whynow?
11 Why Coaching? Why Now? The landscape of business has changed dramatically. Expanding technology, changing populations and a much larger playing field for both opportunity and competition on a global scale. All industries have been challenged to keep up with the ongoing changes, while simultaneously paying attention to growth. Indeed, if you are in healthcare, government, manufacturing, education, services or non-profit you have likely already seen a host of new technology and rapidly changing systems that require your business environment to be agile, innovative, responsive and adaptable. One of the most notable areas of change in recent decades has been the shift from algorithmic work to heuristic work. In other words, the shift from routine, repetitive measurable work, to work that involves critical thinking, analysis and creativity. It has been determined at the time of this writing that 70 percent of current job growth in North America is in heuristic work. Rapid growth in this area is also seen throughout Europe, the Middle East and parts of Asia. Experts see heuristic work only growing, given the need for a rapid and creative response to the evolving business environments. In algorithmic work environments, the old “carrot and stick” or “reward and punishment” worked well, but researchers have found that this approach can be devastating in a heuristic environment. What is more effective for this emerging environment is competency in soft skills. This has become critical for leading a heuristic workforce. Using these skills proficiently allows leaders to tap into employee’s built-in and unique motivation systems. This catalyzes creativity and enhances the heuristic work on which agile, innovative, responsive and adaptable business environments now depend. Enter Coaching Coaching is a must have leadership competency. Taking a coach approach to leadership means mining the very best from others by partnering with them to discover their unique motivation system and strategizing with them to work in alignment with it. Taking a coach approach also means asking others to stretch beyond their comfort zones and leverage their strengths in a variety of areas such as change, creativity, decision-making, communication and even conflict. Having people work in alignment with their unique motivation system and stretching beyond what they would ask of themselves is imperative to creating an organizational culture that is agile, innovative, responsive and adaptable. PART TWO THE CASE FOR COACHING PART TWO - THE CASE FOR COACHING
12 PART TWO - THE CASE FOR COACHING Engagement Coaching leads to higher levels of engagement. The American Management Association and the Institute for Corporate Productivity conducted a study of over 1000 leaders from a variety of businesses and found that 41 percent had used coaching to boost employee engagement. Why? Coaching targets key areas that lead to higher levels of engagement: Expectations are communicated more clearly Blocks to resources are uncovered Dialogues shift from what must be done to what can be done Authentic acknowledgment takes place The focus is on the person, not just the result Shifts in awareness occur which result in sustainable behavioral and developmental change Space is given for opinions and ideas Connections are made between personal goals and organizational goals Team Building When leaders learn coaching skills and employ them with teams, it permeates throughout the team and models a new way of communication that promotes trust, embeds accountability, allows for brilliance to rise up out of chaos and clears pathways to clarity and focus on common goals and results. Coaching also models acceptance of other’s ideas, opinions and ways of being, even when there is no agreement. Change When significant change comes to an organization, it is often met with resistance and confusion. No matter how well it has been planned and communicated, change can incite fear and affect behavior and performance. A leader as coach can help usher in change by working with teams and individuals to understand the connection between the coming change and their aspirations, personal goals and unique motivation system. They become “enrolled” into change versus resistant to it. coaching works
13 PART TWO - THE CASE FOR COACHING Your Case for Coaching A significant objective of coaching is to close the gap. We coach individuals to close the gap between where they are in the present and where they want to go in the future. We will be looking at how to do this throughout this program. To begin, we’d like you to take a look at closing the gap(s) within your group, department or entire organization. The gaps that lie between things as they are right now, and where you would like them to be once coaching becomes an embedded part of your culture. To do this you will initially need a snapshot of where you feel your department, group or organization is with regard to how people communicate and how effective that communication is to develop and move people forward. We’ve supplied a list of questions to get you started. Some of them may or may not pertain to your group or business environment. If they don’t apply, substitute with what would. We encourage you to think beyond our questions into your specific and unique situations, where you see communication breakdowns and blocks. Next, we would like you to brainstorm a bit and create a snapshot of how you would LIKE the environment to be. For now, perhaps simply using descriptors like: open, curious, communicative, creative, systematic, consistent, supportive, etc., might be a way to approach this. Once you have your snapshots of things as they are in this moment, and how you would prefer them to be, we will revisit the areas you have identified at the end of this program. This will help you to build your own case for coaching and a strategy to use coaching and a coach approach to close the gaps in some or all of the areas identified. Where are the most common communication breakdowns? Does performance development really work? If not, what is this costing? What are the most common reasons for turnover? How effectively are people developed to their potential? Is change resisted or accepted? If resisted, how is this affecting the environment and the ability to move forward? How effective are your performance reviews? How clear are people about the big picture direction? Is feedback normally constructive, well received and ultimately impactful? Are teams agile, innovative, responsive and adaptable? Are mistakes considered learning opportunities? What percentage of your department, team or group do you feel is truly engaged? Key Learning Points Businesses and group environments need to be more agile, innovative, responsive and adaptable than ever before due to expanding technology, changing populations and the global playing field. The shift from algorithmic work environments to an explosive growth of heuristic work environments requires a paradigm shift in how communication happens. A coach approach to leadership taps into the unique motivation system of individuals and teams resulting in higher levels of engagement, more cohesive teams and less resistance to change.
14 Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more? PART TWO - THE CASE FOR COACHING
15 The Skills The 5 Core Coaching Skills • Listening • Questioning • Encouraging • Requesting • Action Planning The Mindset The 5 Guiding Principles • Be Curious • Be Accepting • Be Supportive • Be Focused • Be Committed THE 5.5.5 MODEL The Process The 5 Step Coaching Exchange • Identify • Discover • Strategize • Clear the Way • Recap PART TWO - THE CASE FOR COACHING
16 5 step
17 PART THREE THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE IS A FRAMEWORK FOR THE PROCESS OF THE EXCHANGE BETWEEN THE COACH AND COACHEE. WHEREAS THE SKILLS ARE HOW YOU COACH, THE EXCHANGE IS WHAT ACTUALLY OCCURS IN THE PROCESS OF COACHING. THE PROCESS THE SKILLS THE MINDSET The 5 Step Coaching Exchange The 5 Core Coaching Skills The 5 Guiding Principles COACHING EXCELLENCE VIEW EXCHANGE: https://vimeo.com/193411023/ ec10be3110
18 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE The primary objective of the 5 Step Coaching Exchange is to move the coachee forward and into action in some way. This may be just a babystep forward or, in some instances, a quantum leap. In the coaching exchange the measurement of efficacy is by quality, not quantity of that movement. To determine this we ask, is the coachee moving forward towards their desired goal or outcome in the most productive and least resistant way? A multitude of things happen in the coaching exchange. The exchange is where the coach and coachee get clear about what the coachee wants from the coaching or the conversation. It is also where ideas are explored as the coachee begins to unpack the coachable themes throughout the exchange. New information is brought to the surface and possibilities are seeded and grown. New choices get made and new directions are often forged by the coachee as their perspectives are broadened having learned more just by having the exchange. And finally, it is where obstacles get cleared out of the way for the coachee to move forward. The exchange between the coach and coachee can happen in a variety of ways. There are formal exchanges where the coach and coachee have a time and place set aside with the mutual understanding that coaching is going to happen. Formal coaching is usually an ongoing relationship where the coach and coachee meet repeatedly at predetermined intervals. The coach and coachee agree upon an overarching goal(s) to be met within the duration of the coaching term. At each meeting the coachee comes into the exchange with an agenda they would like to be coached on that is related to the overarching goal(s). Formal coaching provides an opportunity for the coachee to work on a large goal or a multitude of goals. Coachee’s grow and develop over time with coachable themes changing at every meeting, but always relative to the overarching goal(s). The coaching exchange can also be an informal exchange. This is not an established coach / coachee relationship and most often, the person receiving coaching may not even know they are being coached. It can occur between a manager and direct report, peer-to-peer, or even direct report to manager. These exchanges occur in what we call ‘coachable moments’ and can happen in the hallway, over lunch or even when someone pops their head in your office and asks, “Do you have a minute?” They are usually brief and can be continued if both parties agree. Both types of exchanges, formal and informal, can happen in person, on the phone or sometimes even over email. “ I don't know exactly where ideas come from, but when I'm working well ideas just appear. I've heard other people say similar things - so it's one of the ways I know there's help and guidance out there. It's just a matter of our figuring out how to receive the ideas or information that are waiting to be heard.” - Jim Henson
19 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Step 1 - Identify Identify Discover Strategize Clear the Way Recap Listening In this first step the coach draws out, with active listening skills, what is going on for the coachee and what the coachee wants for themselves. This is where the coachee unpacks the situation, opportunity or challenge. Often during this part of the coaching exchange, the coachee is trying to convey an elaborate and complex situation that forms as a story. It is the coach’s responsibility to move the ‘story’ forward into discovery, learning and action. After the coachee has unpacked the general overview of their coaching situation, the coach will need to let the coachee know, with active listening skills, they are getting the contextual essence of what the coachee is trying to convey. With reflective listening and paraphrasing, the coach lets the coachee know they ‘get it’. While it is necessary to get a contextual idea of what is happening with the coachee, it is not necessary to know all the details. It’s easy to get caught up in the story itself and miss the opportunity to move the coachee forward into action. As a busy leader, your informal coaching exchanges may only be a few minutes long due to time constraints, so it is important to get the exchange moving forward quickly. Once the coach feels they have identified the contextual essence of the coachee’s situation and the coachee feels that the coach has sufficiently understood their situation, the exchange enters into identifying a gap. This would be the gap between where the coachee is at the moment with the situation and where they would like to go. This is done using active listening and clarifying questions, which are based on and built upon what the coach is hearing. Once the gap is identified, the coach then evokes a succinct focus and desired outcome for the coaching exchange from the coachee. That succinct focus will have to be manageable within the time frame you have available for the exchange. That may mean the desired outcome might have to be reduced down to one small step forward versus completely solving a complicated situation or fully exploring and making a decision on an impending, complex choice to be made.
20 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE THE SITUATION “I am having a very difficult time working with Jerry. When we disagree we get nasty with one another.” IDENTIFY THE GAP “I get that you don’t see eye to eye. And it sounds like it’s uncomfortable for you when it gets nasty. How would you like your relationship to be?” GAP IDENTIFIED “Amicable and respectful.” “So you would like to move this relationship from having nasty disagreements to amicable and respectful disagreements?” “Yes” IDENTIFY A SUCCINCT FOCUS “What is one aspect of this, within your control, we could focus on?” Key Learning Points Identify WHAT they want to accomplish. The gap between where they are and where they want to be. A succinct focus for the time you have. Break down desired outcome for that succinct focus. Listening is the Core Coaching Skill used most. “Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering.” - Paulo Coelho Other examples of questions that can be asked to move into a succinct focus would be: “What is one thing that would be most helpful to focus on first?” “Where should we begin?” What do you want? And how will you know when you get it? What would you like to walk away with by the end of our conversation?
21 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more?
22 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Step 2 - Discover Identify Discover Strategize Clear the Way Recap Listening Listening / Questioning In Step 2, the aim is for both the coach and the coachee to explore the situation deeply and for the coachee to re-frame and reorganize their thinking if needed. This is where the coach helps the coachee explore beyond the obvious to bring awareness to the more hidden motivators of their behaviour. The dialogue moves beyond the story, the goal, desired results and current behaviour into what is below the surface level. The coachee gains deeper and broader understanding of themselves and their situation in Discovery and arrives at a point of clarity and direction. The Core Skills of Listening and Questioning are used predominantly in Discovery. The coach must increase the depth of their listening in this step as the coachee begins to reveal important information that has a large impact on the overall success of attaining their goals. Questions need to be well crafted to encourage the coachee to dig below the surface and into what is not being said or expressed up until that point. “ The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” - Marcel Proust
23 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE The coach acts as an exploration partner and begins to ask mostly clarifying and self-awareness questions to learn more about one or more of the following: How the coachee feels about the situation, the goal, the individuals involved or anything else that is relevant. It is an exploration of emotions with the objective to have the coachee connect with how they are actually feeling about things and to use those feelings as a guide to understanding more. What the coachee believes about the situation, the goal, the individuals involved or themselves. Beliefs are a powerful force that strongly influence behaviours, choices and the success of outcomes. Often beliefs are based on opinions and other unsubstantiated information. As coaches we examine, and sometimes challenge a coachee’s beliefs to ensure that the coachee is informed and influenced by as much fact and real evidence as they can gather. Closely aligned with, but distinctive from beliefs, are perceptions. In the process of discovery, the coach aims to help the coachee broaden their perceptions. This means that the coach listens for where the coachee may be limiting themselves to a narrow view of a situation, their goal, the individuals involved or themselves. The coach asks questions that invite the coachee to look beyond the obvious and into a broader or wider way of thinking. It is important that the coach does not lead or direct the coachee into their way of thinking. Instead, the coach teaches the coachee with powerful, open-ended questions, that they can think beyond the obvious and into that deeper, more profound wisdom that the coachee already possesses. Observable • Emotions • Thinking • Results • Behaviours Invisible • Beliefs • Perspectives COACHING BRINGS AWARENESS TO THE HIDDEN INFLUENCER'S OF BEHAVIOUR.
24 Based on the exploration around feelings, beliefs and perspectives, the coach checks to see where the coachee’s thinking is after new discoveries have been made. Through active listening during the exploration(s), the coach captures and reflects back any new thinking they may have heard from the coachee. The coachee will either agree with, correct and make adjustments to or re-frame what the coach has said to what they feel is correct. In Discovery, the coach and coachee learn together about the coachee’s: Challenges Motivations Fears Prejudices Limiting beliefs Assumptions Attitudes The coach then takes what has been learned and together, the coach and coachee do one or more of the following based on what’s been learned in Discovery: Confirm: That coachee is on a true/best path based on new learning Correct: Anything that is not on a clear/best or true path based on new learning Clarify: Anything that was unclear or ambiguous before new learning Validate: What is clear/best/true for coachee based on what has been covered in Discovery Re-calibrate: Anything that needs to be changed/tweaked based on new learning. It is important for the coach to be a true and trusted exploration partner in Discovery, always holding the coachee to be resourceful and able to learn from what is below the surface. Additional Questions Used for Discovery Why is it important? What part do you play in this situation? What might you take responsibility for? Imagine as if you did have enough resources/ time/people/ money, what would you do differently? Who do you really admire? What advice might they give you about this? How would you know you are successful? Key Learning Points Discovery sets the foundation for what the coaching is about. The coach and coachee discover together, as exploration partners. In Discovery the coach and coachee ensure things are clear and on course. Listening and Questioning are the Core Coaching Skills used most. listening/questioning PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE
25 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more?
26 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Step 3 - Strategize Identify Discover Strategize Clear the Way Recap Listening Listening / Questioning Listening / Questioning Action Planning The coach and the coachee have identified the focus for the coaching and clarified the gap. In addition, the coachee has learned more about themselves and their situation and they are now ready to move forward. This is the time to build a strategy bridge. In this step, the coach and coachee partner to plan out the details that will enable the coachee to bridge the gap from where they are to where they want to get to. The conversation shifts from learning to doing, moving things above the waterline where the focus turns to solidifying actions and attaining results. In strategizing, the coach and coachee devise a path of least resistance. By that we mean a way for the coachee to get across the bridge with “All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved. ” - Sun Tzu the least amount of resistance within themselves and resistance from outside forces. Simplifying and breaking down overwhelming or complex portions into manageable pieces is key. Deep listening becomes critical because the coach will need to hear any resistance the coachee may be having in reaction to attaining their goal or desired end result. Peeling away complexity and resistance is every bit as important as building the strategy. Not all strategies are filled with details and measurable results. In Part Four this Learning Guide is the Core Coaching Skill of Action Planning where we will look at three types of actions: Tangible Discovery and Learning Evolutionary Discovery and Learning, as well as Evolutionary actions may only require part of the bridge built minus the more concrete, measurable steps. Your discernment is necessary for what parts are appropriate.
27 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE WHERE THEY ARE Verify Commitment Outline Resources Determine Timeline Goal Chart Prioritize Actions WHERE THEY WANT TO GO Building a strategy bridge signifies a commitment to move forward and take action. It is where plans get made, details are discussed and tactics are weighed and measured. This step requires the coach to use the Core Coaching Skills of listening, questioning and action planning. There are five components to building the strategy bridge. 1. Verify Commitment The coach will clarify what the coachee is actually committing to and will check to see the level of commitment the coachee has. The coach will be listening for any lack of clarity, hesitation or uncertainty. Some questions the coach may ask in this component are: In one sentence, what is your objective? Are you fully committed to ? Did I just hear some uncertainty? What’s that about? 2. Outline Resources The coach ensures that the coachee has the resources needed to successfully accomplish what they want. Resources can be tangible such as the right people, the right place/space, the correct tools, etc. Or they can be intangible such as time, advocates or methods of influence. The coach is listening for what may be missing or under/overestimated in this component. Some questions that may get asked are: What are the resources you’ll need to accomplish this? Who can help with that? What is needed for this to be successful?
28 3. Determine Timeline The coach and coachee will work together to determine a doable timeline that will ensure success. The coach will be listening for possible over-commitment or underestimation of how long something may take. Only the coachee knows for sure what they are capable of, but it is appropriate for the coach to check in on things that may sound off. The coach can introduce the notion of under-promising and over-delivering in this component. Some questions the coach may ask in determining the timeline are: When will you begin / achieve / deliver / complete ? Is that a realistic time frame? When you say you can get this done by , are you accounting for the unexpected things that may come up along the way and building in some extra time? Do know for sure what people’s expectations are for this to be completed? 4. Goal Chart Visual representations of the goal and the strategy around it is a wonderful coaching tool for more complex plans. A goal chart should capture all the moving parts of the strategy into an easy to glance at visual where the coachee can actively chart their progress as they move along their timeline. Some questions that the coach may ask to help the coachee create the most helpful goal chart for themselves are: What would be the most helpful things for you to see quickly to know you are on target? How will you gauge where you are in the process? How will you know you are on track? How will you know you have achieved your objective? 5. Prioritize Actions The coach and coachee will work together to sort out what the highest priority actions are in the strategy. This may shift and change as the strategy bridge is built. The coach may need to dig deep with questions to help the coachee organize competing priorities in the process. Again, the coach is listening for uncertainly and lack of clarity around what actions come first. Some questions the coach may ask are: What comes first? Which action, if completed before the others, will make the others easier? It is important to know that the five components can take place in any order and are not to be considered a linear process. As we mentioned earlier, not every component is appropriate to use for different types of actions. PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Key Learning Points Strategizing is how the coach and coachee bridge the gap from where the coachee is to where they want to be. The coach and coachee co-create a path of least resistance. The strategy is built by: Verifying the commitment Outlining resources Determining timeline Goal charting Prioritizing actions Listening, Questioning and Action Planning are the Core Coaching Skills used most.
29 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more?
30 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Step 4 - Clear the Way Identify Discover Strategize Clear the Way Recap Listening Listening / Questioning Listening / Questioning Action Planning Listening / Questioning Requesting The focus has been clarified, the learning has occurred, the strategy set in place and now it is time to clear the way. In this step of the exchange, the coach and coachee will look for anything that may get in the way of or create resistance to the coachee moving forward toward their goal or desired outcome. It is easy to get swept up in all the ideas, planning and forward movement, yet turn a blind eye towards this part of the process. Without it, once the coachee sets out on executing their strategy, all the forward motion may come to a screeching halt. Clearing the way means clearing resistance. It means looking for people, places and things that may put a drag on things. It also means getting unnecessary complexities out of the way. Often, complexities go unnoticed or are manufactured or assumed that they’ll have to be lived with. A close examination with some probing questions can bring these to the surface and decisions can be made or a piece added to the strategy to circumvent the resistance if it shows up. A coachee’s attitude or beliefs can also slow down or shut down their forward movement. The coach will need to explore those things below the waterline (emotions, beliefs, ways of thinking and perceptions) relative to what is above the waterline (behaviours and results) and help the coachee to explore correlations between the two. “ Often it isn’t the mountains ahead that wear you out, it’s the little pebble in your shoe. ” - Muhammad Ali
31 Addressing and eliminating obstacles Some obstacles may be apparent immediately, but most will take time to bring to the surface. The coach does this by listening deeply to what may only be detectable between the lines of what the coachee is saying. Or it may be listening for what isn’t being said at all. Curiosity and exploration catalyze the questions the coach will ask. Once on the surface, the coach and coachee can set up action plans to move the obstacle(s) out of the way, or eliminate them completely. Some questions the coach may ask: What may get in the way? I haven’t heard you say anything about , what’s going to happen with that? I heard you say you were tired/frustrated/ confused a few minutes ago. Is that going to impact your ability to do this in any way? What’s it going to take to work around/ through that? Acquiring appropriate support We all like to think of ourselves as independent and capable to do things on our own. Many people covet their autonomy and can become reluctant to ask for help, even in dire circumstances. The coach is always on the lookout for ‘support resistance’ and is always aware that support may be needed. In the Coaching Exchange, it could be enough to simply ask the coachee what support will be needed. If more exploration is necessary, the coach may have go back into Discovery and explore beliefs and attitudes around asking for help and securing support. Some questions the coach may ask: Who do you need assistance/help from to do this? What support do you need to do that? How do you feel about asking for help? How can I support you best? What would keep you from asking for help on this? PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE What Clearing the Way Means
32 Defining and filling in what is missing As things unfold, even after the strategy is built, there may be something additional missing that wasn’t thought of before. This is the time to check in to see what, if anything is missing. Questions the coach may ask: What’s missing? Who do you need to talk to in order to find out what you don’t know? Is there anything we haven’t covered? Navigating relationships with self, time and others Successful strategies usually require a dose of reality. Again, it is easy to get swept up in the planning, forward motion and vision of what is ahead, but reality can derail even the bestlaid plans. Those derailments often come from unexamined possibilities in our relationships with ourselves, others or time. Some questions a coach can ask are: How might you get in your own way? Who do you need to enroll into your strategy? How will you handle push-back from others? What will keep you accountable? How can you make space in your calendar/ diary to ensure success? Is this a realistic time frame given all that needs to be done? Letting go of limiting beliefs, attitudes and assumptions Clearing the way often means pushing down the walls that keep our perspectives narrow or not seeing things as they really are. We cannot accomplish what we don’t believe is accomplishable. We cannot see what doesn’t exist in our belief system. Without knowing what is truthfully so, we are informed by and act upon assumptions and guesses. These become invisible obstacles to success. Some questions the coach can ask: How may your attitude be getting in the way of success? What would it take to give that up? Do you know that for sure, or are you guessing? If you were to look at this from ’s perspective, what would you see that you don’t see now? Do you believe this can be done? The Relationship Between Requesting and Clearing the Way In Part 4 you will learn about the core coaching skill of requesting. Coaches make requests when the coachee is stuck, holding back or selling themselves short. When Clearing the Way, an opportunity for making a request will usually present itself. Know a request is designed to stretch someone out of their comfort zone and into action or forward movement in a bigger way than they may even know they are ready for. Key Learning Points Clearing the way means creating a path of least resistance. When clearing the way – Address obstacles Ensure they have proper support Identify what is missing Road map relationships Let go of what needs letting go of Listening, Questioning and Requesting are the Core Coaching Skills used most. PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE
33 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Learning Journal Things to reflect on: What surprised you? What puzzled you? What inspired you? What was the most interesting to you? What do you need to know more about? How can you go about finding out more?
34 PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE Step 5 - Recap Identify Discover Strategize Clear the Way Recap Listening Listening Listening / Questioning Listening / Questioning Action Planning Listening / Questioning Requesting The Recap brings to light where the coachee is in their thinking. In short, it is a very succinct, clear summary of what they now know and what they are going to do. The coach and coachee solidify a mutual understanding of what is going to happen moving forward and how it will be done. The recap is also an anchoring of what has been explored, learned and committed to. It is the final tie off of any loose ends. The recap would also be considered the close of the coaching exchange. The coachee is ALWAYS the one to give the recap. The coach simply listens and may check in on a couple of things with some clarifying questions, but listening is the primary skill used. The coach is listening for clarity, commitment and consistency. Is the coachee: Clear with what they are doing and where they are going? Fully committed and ready to do what they said they would do? Consistent in what they have said up until now in the exchange? “ I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.” - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
35 Why the Coachee Does the Recap In closing, the coach asks the coachee to step up and take ownership for what they have said they want and will do by having the coachee recap all they have committed to in the coaching dialog. This is THEIR show, not the coach’s. Having the coachee do the recap anchors: New Learning The coachee will usually mention the new awareness or learning they have from the coaching and it’s relevance to the actions they are committing to. Commitment We all know that saying it out loud to someone else makes it real. It commits us in a way we don’t commit when we are alone with our plans. Accountability In the recap, the coachee is taking responsibility for what they have said they want to be accountable for. They are making a verbal statement where their level of commitment is evident in their tone, words and energy. Actions to Be Taken When the coachee has to reflect to another the action plan they have brainstormed and created for themselves in a clear and concise way, it anchors the plan. Forward Movement Again, articulating the plan for forward movement anchors the commitment to do so. Questions to Open a Recap What are you willing to commit to as a result of this conversation? What is your plan of action? By when? What was the value of this conversation for you? What are you taking away from this conversation and what will you do differently? Key Learning Points Brings to light where the coachee is at the end of the coaching Cements forward action The Coachee does the verbal recap Recapping anchors: New learning Commitments Accountability Actions Forward movement Listening is almost exclusively the only Core Coaching Skill used PART THREE - THE 5 STEP COACHING EXCHANGE
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