51 PART FOUR - THE 5 CORE COACHING SKILLS A Coach Approach to Encouraging Encourage the Person, Not the Results When we encourage in coaching, we encourage the person, not the results. Again, when the coach holds the belief that the coachee is capable and resourceful, there is a trust on the coach’s part that great results are a by-product when the full capabilities and strengths of the coachee are encouraged into action. AN EXAMPLE OF ENCOURAGING RESULTS WOULD BE; I know you can complete this project on time and within budget. AN EXAMPLE OF ENCOURAGING THE PERSON WOULD BE; Your strengths in organization and leadership are sure to contribute enormously to the overall success of this project. Acknowledging A powerful component when using the coach approach to encouraging is the use of acknowledgment. Acknowledging the coachee means recognizing a truth about them and who they are as a person. The goal of acknowledging is to enable the coachee to recognize and own this part of themselves. When done authentically, it leaves the coachee with a sense of strength and confidence and can last as a new, positive aspect of their self-awareness. When coaching, there is a vast distinction between acknowledgment, praise and compliments. Praise carries a tone of approval and is an expression of your benevolence. Compliments have your personal judgment or the judgment of others stamped on them. They are an expression and reflection of your preferences. Acknowledgment carries a tone of recognition and respect. A recognition for who the person is and the value they bring. PRAISE COMPLIMENT ACKNOWLEDGMENT I like the way you get things done. You are so good at getting things done. It’s very apparent that you really care. It shows in your commitment to get the job done. I am proud of the way you handled that. You handled that really well. Your communication skills were amazing in the way that you handled that. I think you did a great job. Everybody thinks you did a great job. You inspire everyone around you with your dedication to excellence. All about “me” the coach. I as coach approve of your actions. “You did a great job.” Coach stamp of approval. About “me” the coach coming from a place of judgement. “I am so impressed how you handled that” Comes from a place of observation. Always about the client. “It really sounds like you understand the different now.“ Mindfulness of how you say things, what your filters are and your level of belief in the ability and resourcefulness of your coachee, along with practice, can greatly improve the type of encouragement you give in your coaching.
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