Resource Library
Welcome to our resource library where you will find articles, webinars, videos and anything else that will further you along your coaching journey. Search or use any of these tags to help find your tips.
Mindfullness- helping us to take coaching “mainstream”
When some people hear the word mindfulness, they immediately dismiss it as some esoteric Eastern meditation practice or New Age mumbo jumbo. However, mindfulness is an important ability to work on for coaches – or anyone else.
First, let me clarify what I mean by “mindfulness.” There are multiple views of what mindfulness is and is not, but in the most general sense, we can think of several levels of mindfulness, ranging from a basic level of awareness up through the sharp internal mental focus of a longtime meditator or yoga practitioner. For our purposes here, I am referring to a more open-minded awareness of others and of the environment itself, rather than awareness of one’s own internal processes and thoughts. Internal mindfulness is certainly a great topic, but it’s one for another day.
Service in 7 inch heels
The following is a guest post from Tom Maher “the Musician’s Coach” who we met at the recent ICF conference. No more introduction needed, this blog post will give you a great sense of the man behind the “heels”!
If you haven’t met me before, let me introduce myself. My name is Tom Maher and I am a professionally trained and certified life coach. I also professionally impersonate Paul Stanley of KISS in KISS Tribute Bands. Some would think this is an unusual combination, but for me, it works.
I was recently asked how I can be authentic as a coach when I spend so much time being someone else, or “inauthentic”. I told them that no matter how much of Paul or Paul’s mannerisms I try to emulate, I always make sure that I am shining through that trademark star.
Managing Performance or Coaching?
When managers take the 5/5/5 Coaching Skills Training Program from Coaching Out of the Box® there is often a lively discussion about where the line is between managing and coaching. So I’d like to take a minute here to give you my take on this.
Professional coaches are trained to step away from their own agendas and assumptions in order to coach most effectively. They hold an open space for the people they are coaching to discover their own resourcefulness by supporting and encouraging them to reach deep into their own wisdom and creativity to discover answers and solutions for themselves. Managers usually don’t have this luxury. They have deliverables that must be met and must manage performance to meet them. This almost always means there is an agenda for the manager when they enter into performance conversations. So if this is the case, why should managers even go to the trouble to learn coaching skills?
My Vision for the Year Ahead
Recently our core team met in Toronto and sat down to define our overarching vision. We had an amazing time and this exercise reconnected us to the power of coaching and to what we’re most passionate about. Together we agreed on our vision: Every human spirit ignited. Igniting spirits is what got me into coaching so many years ago. Our team is absolutely passionate about mobilizing people and getting them focused on moving forward and making progress.
New Year Opportunities, Goals and Dreams
If you are like most of us as we enter a new year, you are creating a plan that may include new behaviors, ideas, strategies and actions to achieve a desired outcome (dream or goal). Yes? I know that it is absolutely true for me and true for those in my household. My husband and my three daughters have all made reference to ‘changes’ they want, with statements like: “In the new year I will….” or “This year I will be better at….” or “My goal for 2013 is to pay attention to……”. Sound at all familiar? Of course!
As I listened to them, and to my own thoughts about what I would like to accomplish in the upcoming year, I went into thinking as a coach (no surprise) and asked myself the following questions:
Play or Sit?
Life is a wonderful game to be played and not watched from the sidelines. That means we have to be willing to take chances and get in the game or we’ll never know what it feels like to score a goal, sink a three-pointer, or make a touchdown.
OK, enough with the bad sports analogy. Think about it though, as coaches in order to challenge our clients to play a bigger game, we have to be willing to challenge ourselves. So, when was the last time you took a chance? When was the last time you threw caution to the wind and just went for something?
Curiosity: A key element of the Coach Approach
Think about what we do as coaches: We listen. We ask questions. We clarify. We reflect the essence of what we hear/observe so that a client can see themselves. And then assist in moving to desired results. What we do is truly brilliant and helpful work.
And, what we do is not enough. Who we are being while coaching, is as important as what we are doing. This highlights an important guiding principle in our work as coaches: Curiosity. We must be curious Simply, if we are curious, we actually stimulate discovery, new awareness and ultimately results.
Assuming this is true, how can be learn to be more curious? Ciskszentmihalyi stated in his book “Flow”, that…..”…..we can develop our curiosity (and fight boredom) by making a conscious effort to direct our attention to something in particular in our environment.” So, if we direct our attention fully to our clients and become explorers, curious as to what we will discover together, this will actually enhance our ability to even BE curious!
A Child-Like Perspective
Have you ever watched a child pick up something and investigate it as if it were the coolest thing they have ever seen? They often explore what we might consider the most simple things with a wide-eyed curiosity and enthusiasm. It is a beautiful thing to see; to see a child so present in the moment, learning, and enthralled by the things surrounding them.
Isn’t it true that as adults we sometimes get so lost in all the day-to-day that we sometimes don’t see what’s around us? We forget to be present in the moment, clouding our ability to see the great learning experiences and fantastic opportunities. Heck, we even forget to breathe!
How does the color blue suit you?
Silence Truly is Golden
Silence is a beautiful thing. Silence provides us with a break from all the buzz. It affords us some breathing space. It can be a sanctuary from the hustle and bustle of the day-to-day. As coaches, it can be one of the most powerful coaching tools in our coaching toolbox.
You may have already noticed or experienced this, but when there’s silence there’s a natural urge to fill it. In the coaching conversation, when you use silence you give the other person the time and the space to reflect before responding. Think about it, you have asked that jewel of a question, a real eye-opener, what better way to highlight that question then to go silent?
Beware of the coach who has no coach.
One of the first things I did after completing my Certificate in Executive Coaching (CEC) from Royal Roads University was hire one of the best coaches that I could find. In my case, this wasn’t a particularly difficult task as I had been exposed to so many amazing coaches.
I realize that I was very lucky, finding a great coach can be difficult for those people that do not have the same level of exposure to the coaching world that I had. I did a quick Google search to see what information would be available to people interested in hiring a coach – there is an incredibly overwhelming amount of information out there! No wonder people are intimidated by the prospect of searching for a coach.
